January 4, 2017 6:08pm

I was in line behind one of the old guys from the landing at the barbecue food truck. The owner thought the guy had ordered two of the same meal and had plated double. The woman who was second in line had a large McDonald’s cup in her hand. I thought we were wearing the same boots but they were actually different. She ordered a plate and a thing of banana pudding then said to me, “I’m going full fat tonight and getting dessert.”

When it was my turn to order, the owner gave me a free bowl of Brunswick stew that he had plated for the first guy. He told me he was sure I was going to love it. I also asked for a small cup or bowl to put some ketchup in; I am out and keep forgetting to buy some. He gave me a few of those little mouthwash cups and told me to also take some of a certain other sauce, that it was great on fries and hush puppies. The sauce tasted so familiar, but I couldn’t place it. I ate all of the food I ordered and put the stew in the refrigerator for the next day. Maybe I’d take it to lunch in case the chicken fried rice I was also planning to bring wasn’t enough.

Later that night, I told my friends I couldn’t come to trivia as planned because I was too full and had also been fighting a cold all week. I decided to take a shower and go to bed early. In the shower I started coughing, which triggered my gag reflex and I threw up all the food. I tried to stop but it was so gross that it made me sick and I threw up even more. I was worried it would clog my drain, but it didn’t. I felt better afterwards and was able to go to sleep without feeling sick.

January 3, 2017 12:22pm

Today was my first day at my new job. When the IT guy came by to set up my password, he also showed me how to use the map on the website to find all the restaurants nearby. Many of them were still closed for the holiday, so I decided to get fast food a little further out. I found a Cookout ten minutes away, so I went there. All Cookouts have double lanes for ordering, but not all of them have both lanes’ windows on the driver’s side, which is very frustrating to me. I accidentally went in the lane that has the window on the passenger’s side and had to go out and come back in again. Also all the Cookouts in my experience have the speaker way too loud and it hurts my ears.

I ordered a big double tray with a chicken quesadilla and corn dog. I also asked for some extra mustard for my corn dog. When I got to the window, the cashier gave me my order quickly and was not very friendly. I felt rushed, so I did not check to make sure I got the mustard. Something told me they didn’t put it in. I pulled into a parking space in the shopping center where the restaurant was and opened my tray. Of course there was no mustard. I was doubly frustrated, because the last time I had gone to Cookout I got the same order and did not use the mustard so I put it in the door handle but then took it out and gave it to my dad when I was home for Christmas, so I missed two opportunities to have mustard for my corn dog.

Across the lot from me I saw three men standing and eating their Cookout off the back of their work truck. The truck had two matching Trump/Pence bumper stickers on the back windshield. The biggest building in the shopping center was something called Strawbridge Studios Inc. The door only had the name on it, and there were no other signs indicating what kind of goods or services this company offered. A man in a suit walked out at one point, but that wasn’t enough of a clue to figure out what the business was. On the roof were four of those plastic owls for scaring away birds. I wondered if there may have been more towards the back that I couldn’t see.

December 29, 2016 5:58pm

On my way to the gyro food truck tonight, I passed by the elderly people who convene at the tables on the landing and realized I always eat at the same time they do. I wondered how many people my age live in my building. While I was waiting for my order at the food truck, a guy walked up and asked the owner how much he charged for drinks. The owner told him $2 and I was worried he was going to let the guy go ahead of me. The guy asked for a Diet Coke and put his cash between the row of drinks and the edge of the window. I stared at the money, hoping the owner wouldn’t touch it before he finished making and wrapping up my gyro. To my relief, he passed me my food and took my card. The drink guy pointed to his money again and said “It’s right there, in case you didn’t see it.” The owner handed him the drink and he walked away. I told the owner that the drinks in the vending machine inside are only $1.50, so it was neat that the guy bought one from the food truck. On the way back to my apartment, I texted as I walked down the hallway. Every time I looked up, I felt further away from my door than it seemed like I should be. I kept looking down to text and then looking back up, expecting to be closer than I was. It made me very anxious.


December 20, 2016 6:06pm

I decided to go get seconds at the food truck. The jalapenos from the first order still burned my lips. I told the guy at the window that I’m not normally this type of girl. I took the jalapeno-habanero-cheddar-mashed potato bites back to my apartment, put them on the ottoman, and took a picture for Instagram.

December 20, 2016 5:31pm

The potato food truck came to my apartment tonight. I stood in line trying to decide what I wanted before it was my turn to order. I wanted a Tex Mex style baked potato, but they also had a type of mashed potato popper mixed with cheddar, habanero, and jalapeno peppers. I thought about getting both, but told myself I didn’t need $13 worth of food truck potato products. When I got up to my apartment, I put the potato on my ottoman and took a picture for Instagram.

December 16, 2016 7:46pm

After spending over five minutes looking for the cat and trying not to get anxious wondering if he got out, I decided to make waffles. I pulled the toaster down and wondered how gross it would be if a bug got in there. There’s a bad smell coming from the freezer. Bad smells don’t usually come from the freezer, usually it’s the refrigerator. There is old food in the refrigerator. I haven’t needed to get in there all week, so I haven’t opened it lately.

December 16, 2016 6:22pm

My teapot whistled for the first time today when I was boiling water for cup noodles. It always made a sputtering noise before this, so I thought it was just a kind that didn’t whistle. I felt a kind of pride, like the teapot had learned how to do something. It was like watching a baby bird learn to fly or a lion cub make its first kill.

While I was waiting I was watching the first episode of the second season of Parks and Rec. I didn’t recognize the song Leslie was rapping until the very end. It was “Parents Just Don’t Understand.” I don’t know that song very well.

December 13, 2016 11:08pm

I met up with my friends at Ruckus after my hair appointment. It had taken four hours, which was about double what I was expecting. My hair never looks good after I get it done, so I brought a hat to put on. When I got to Ruckus, my friends said it didn’t look like I had done anything to it. This was frustrating to me, because it had taken so long and I had a significant amount of blonde put into it. I know that it was probably hard to tell because it was dark in the bar and I was wearing a hat, but it still hurt my feelings.

I didn’t get food because I was trying to be good, but then I had three beers and started wanting Taco Bell. I got in line in the drive through but it didn’t move at all for ten minutes. I decided to leave and go home but then I passed McDonald’s and saw that line was much shorter. I ordered two McDoubles and thought I might should’ve only gotten one. I watched the person at the window passing out the order to the car in front of me, and I didn’t see anything except bottles of water. I wondered if I had missed the rest of the order or if they had really only ordered several bottles of water. When I got up to the window, I noticed a sign that said this franchise owner’s name was Ric Richards and I thought that was silly. As I ate the burgers on the way home, I realized I definitely should’ve only gotten one. I also got mustard on my radio.